“Moon Knight” Episode 5 R&R: Ned Flanders Thinks You’re Full of It
“So I says to him, the bad new is that I was trying to reach you yesterday…Get it?”
by Rob LoAlbo
All photos courtesy Marvel Studios and Disney Plus
After watching this week’s episode, what’s the show’s verdict? I’m still unclear about the direction, and my enthusiasm is definitely on the dark side of the waning Egyptian moon. Sure, there’s a weird logic to it all, but does all this approach drive narrative engagement and plot development enough to make for an interesting show? Or is my brain seeking shelter from all this drivel and will form another personality that can tolerate it?
To paraphrase Dr. Harrow, is this show sense? Or nonsense?
I want a hippopotamus for Christmas, but instead I’m getting spoilers. Get ready!
Well, we knew from the beginning that this show was going to be driven more by character than plot, something we are seeing in this very plot-lite episode. Do we actually go anywhere? Do anything? Push the narrative forward? No, but we do get to fill in a lot of history holes for Marc and Steven, if we are to believe the hippo.
“It’s just a jump to the left!”
From what we can tell, it seems that we are not in a psych ward at all, and that Marc can actually Tomb Raid with the best of them. Marc is journeying through Duat, the Egyptian underworld, and maneuvering his way with Taweret as his guide (probably). Marc manifested the psych ward because Duat is too difficult for the human mind to comprehend, or at least for Marc’s simple mind to. (Steven seems waaay more excited about this than he should be. He does know they’re dead, right?) They’re on an ark headed for the Field of Reeds but only if their hearts are balanced properly on the scales of justice against the feather of truth, something that was foreshadowed in the opening episode when Harrow used his magic arm scales. If it balances, then St. Peter opens the pearly gates, or something. Unfortunately, the scales don’t balance and we need a plan B.
To achieve balance, truth must be revealed. Steven’s game, but Marc is all hidey hole about what he wants to remember, as his upbringing was filled with trauma. First stop is the Hall of Ex-Criminals where Marc must face down the consequences of every kill he’s ever done, a reveal that gets the scales moving. (A good start, so on to the next scene of horror!)
The economy has gotten so bad lately that feathers have been far outweighing a pound of flesh.
Steven starts realizing that Marc’s childhood was not very Leave it to Beaver-esque, so guessing there’s repressed memories there, he chases down a small child. He finds out that Marc once had a younger brother who died while under Marc’s watch, and Mommie Dearest blames him for the untimely demise (rather than investigate why a cave affected by ocean tides exists so close to city dwelling tenements). Steven wasn’t “born” yet, so he hasn’t seen these memories that Marc has been too afraid to face up to. In these brutal moments of child abuse, Dad’s doing his best to raise him, but Mom falls to fits of screaming, alcohol abuse, and ruining more birthday parties than gluten-free cake and pineapple pizza.
Bouncing around inception-like, Marc and Steven end up at the mercenary slaughter site of Layla’s father as ordered by Bushman, Marc’s former boss who plays a larger role in the comics as a major Moon Knight adversary. (Whether that will come forward as a show point in the last episode remains to be seen.) After being injured by Bushman (maybe?), Marc crawls his way into an Egyptian tomb (for reasons) and just before he kills himself (out of guilt?), Khonshu finds his opening and takes over Marc’s body as avatar, protecting the “travelers of the night,” whatever that means.
It was at that moment when Marc began to wonder if protecting “travelers of the night” meant paying for gas and tolls.
But when the souls hit the floor, Marc decides it’s time to free Khonshu. Taweret has a change of heart (come on, she’s known them for at least 10 minutes, so of course she would betray Osiris) and steers the boat back through the gates and into Marc’s childhood room where Steven was created. You see, Marc invented Steven, and when the going got too tough, Steven was there to protect Marc from the bad memories. Tomb Buster Steven Grant who felt no fear was always there to make the pain go away. More importantly, poor Steven realizes he isn’t the original: he’s just a coping mechanism. Like we called it in the opening episode when we heard him talking on the phone to his mum, who’s not around–-he just thinks she is. Two months beforehand at Mom’s Shiva, Steven took over permanently, which is when Layla lost track of Marc. (The most impressive part: Steven managed to secure gainful employment under such short notice.)
When the scales still don’t balance, the sand people show up to claim what’s theirs, although they’re about as durable as one-ply toilet paper in a rainstorm. Steven meets his fate when he falls off and turns to stone (again, reasons), and because Marc laments the loss, the scales balance (reasons again) and Marc makes it to Sting’s Fields of Gold. (Just don’t stand so close to him.)
Sure the Field of Reeds seems like heaven at first, until you realize that all the reeds play “It’s a Small World” on repeat for eternity.
Sense? Or nonsense?
It’s hard to feel much of anything in this episode because Marc and Steven have both become unreliable narrators; at any given time we don’t know what the actual stakes are. The rules are all very unclear, as is the actual narrative, so should we be worried about Harrow’s nefarious plot to raise Ammit? About Steven becoming a Tusken Raider and succumbing to the sand people? Whether or not Layla is still a few sandwiches short of a picnic? If she’s been kidnapped instead? Reality is relative, so until the final episode, we won’t know what to feel. And when the reasons for all of these events is so vague or undefined, our faith that it will all make sense is equivalent to our faith in the effectiveness of Dr. Harrow’s bedside manner.
The biggest issue is that this show is all setups without any payoffs. Everything is a red herring, and with a distaste for seafood, I’ll always choose the chicken dish. Hawkeye was the king of setups and payoffs, so it’s disheartening to follow it up so closely with all appetizers and no buffet; we need a palate payoff, not just lots of taste bud teases. And speaking of food metaphors, this show lacks any kind of breadcrumb trail at all to further scrutinize and investigate. Remember when we were all studying screen captures of Loki online for clues? Not a one here.
Nope, no clues here, either. Indeed, very clueless.
Now, let’s say that next week comes in hot and hard and pays off big by showing us that it’s ALL in his head. Cool, but that still doesn’t excuse four episodes of Lara Crofting that meant nothing. I like that they pulled the rug out from under us last episode, but I have a feeling that instead of doubling down on the subterfuge, they’re going to back off and return us to our original storyline. Ratio-wise, it’s got to go back to the desert, which will undoubtedly make the show incredibly unsatisfying. If they can find some way to force us to reconsider everything in a new light, maybe there’s a chance at the show getting a new life through reincarnation. Otherwise, next week’s episode is going down with a bad taste in our mouths.
Or who knows. Maybe Kang will show up in this show, too.
Next week: The taste of Khlav Kalash on a stick washed down with crab juice
Star City Rating: 2½ out of 5 (unless next week pulls off a miracle)